OLD GLORY TAKES CHICAGO!
After years of playing second fiddle here in the Second City, OLD GLORY (Colin Bach) took Friday's Semifinal title. Joining him at the National Finals in Austin will be NOCHE (Nicole Massett) and ANDRES SEGOVIAIR (J.D. Frankland). We caught up with the family-friendly patriot-champion before he was escorted to his next appearance. "I melted some fucking faces tonight," quipped Glory. "And then fucked those faces."