Sacramento Air Guitar sells out! (in the good way)

June 8th was a perfect night for air guitar - the venue was SOLD OUT, the judges were

incredAIRble, and the talent was out of this world. Lt Facemelter said it best when he said “This

is US Air Guitar at its absolute best. Their production is an art form. Their competitors were

Nationals worthy. The crowd was fucking AMAZING.”

Sweetness, Rockus, and Kitkat started the show out right with an intro heavily inspiAIRed by

Ready Player One and Airnidette and featuring video game sound effects, confetti canons, and

of course - plenty of dick jokes. The evenings Emcees, Rockus and KitKat, could barely hear

themselves introduce the competitors over the roar of the crowd.

Blaze.jpg

Saucy Stasi (AKA Aphrodesia Savic) took us to the Danger Zone when she started out the

show with a signature costume reveal and some true badassery. Foxy Frets stole everyone’s

hearts with a delicious rendition of Foxy Lady complete with hair and tail whips, earning her a 17.0 and a place in round two.

Cameron Axl Rose gave us fun, frenetic strums while leaning into the dad bod vibes. Thunder Thor earned best costume of the night when he took the stage in a light-up cloud tutu, a very well-placed lightning bolt, and well… not much else.

thunder thor.jpg

Shout out to the following rookie competitors for stellAIR performances. Whole Lotta Rose –

who strutted onstage swigging from her box of Franzia; Dynamite Kicks – who had looney toon

levels of energy; and Aireal who performed a punk version of under the sea and only lost out on

points for too much dancing. All air guitarists know that the dance to air guitar ratio is a difficult

one to perfect. We’re expecting Aireal to come back stronger than ever next year because of her killer stage presence and acrobatic proclivity.

Sac Air Guitar_June 8 2019_0148_Lo Res_Lo Res_.jpg
Group.jpg

The judges of the evening kept the comments constructive and the show moving fluidly. Tarra

Sissom – the fierce Cannibal Queen from B Street Theatre’s 2018 production of Airness; Dave

Pierini – the director of Airness and our favorite Artistic Associate at B Street Theatre; and, air

guitar royalty – Cold Steel Renegade.

Fan Air Nation, air guitar’s #1 fan, performed a cut of Take on Me that had the whole audience

singing along and that earned him a 17.3. Veteran air guitarist Blaze Badaxxe moonwalked his way masterfully through a Billie Jean cover eliciting cheers of “6.0” from the crowd and earning

a 17.2.

Sac Air Guitar_June 8 2019_0995_Lo Res_Lo Res_.jpg

Sacramento Air Guitar has never seen anything like Tyrannicus before. His commitment to character, his technique, and his ferocity placed him firmly in first place with 17.5 going into Round 2.

chewie.jpg

Mr. Universe performed a sultry little number and promptly impregnated the first three rows of

onlookers. Airmerican Icon commanded the stage with unbridled joy and athleticism. Strap

Tease delivered a technically gratifying performance all while rocking patent leather booty

shorts and a truly jaw-dropping body harness. Our favorite Wookiee, Chewrocka, finished out

the 1 st round and used the Force to bring the house down, earning him a spot in round 2 and a

score of 17.1.

If you’re ever feeling the slightest bit gloomy, do yourself a favor and watch the halftime show.

There is something magical about Cold Steel lunging deep into a slow jam while our very

special surprise guest, Dry Ice, bounces up and down behind him in a star costume. It

vanquishes all unhappiness effective immediately. Side effects include highly contagious bursts

of laughter and artificial turf burns. Call your doctor if effects persist after 6 hours.

All of the round 2 competitors were phenomenal but two in particular displayed true ~Airness~.

Fan Air wowed the crowd when he jumped into midair splits without missing a single beat of

Jessie’s Girl. But the show was stolen the second that Tyrannicus drew the number for Gay

Bar and took off his jacket to reveal a leather harness that would make Strap Tease proud and

would make Mom Jeans blush. He played like he knew the exact cut, his hair whips were

flawless and the crowd lost their collective minds.

It was our pleasure to crown Tyrannicus as Sacramento’s 2019 Air Guitar Champion and it will be our pleasure to welcome him back all the way from LA in 2020 to defend his crown with all

that ferocity we’ve come to crave.

Tyr.jpg



Rob Messel