USAG: I'm on a boat

In case anyone was worried about the catastrophic carmageddon that was going to destroy all of Southern California, etc. etc., worry no more.  Our leadership just spoke with Caltrans chief Cindy McKim who reiderated her statement from the official press release. “We expect light to moderate traffic” on most alternate routes between LA and San Diego for the entire weekend.  As far as all the mayhem in the papers? “That’s just the news being the news.” 

So we decided to throw a boat party to celebrate.  Come join us, there’s a jetpack here.